
Note: Not for Resale

The Journey Begins

26th May
Indestructible money lobby
Stinks awfie like a jobby
When citizens die alone
As PM toasts his own.π₯
Plebiscite’s a distorted sight
When yer vote turns tae laughs,
An gaffs
An guffaws
That echo roond the money ha’s.
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
Dark clouds loomin oer the UK
Sae dinnae think that aw’s okay
Fir the nightmare oan civvy street
Will no gan away
Weel certainly no the day!π«
25th May
A buddy ca’d Sue
Hae been scrieven aboot a do, or two
An the day’s the day
She’ll hae her say!
Oh whit a Gray day for some,
Either yon fakes sittin oan thir bum,
Yon yins that turn liquid gold tae scum,
Or ye wie a franchise tae protect
Micht see the hale clamjamfry wrecked.
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
It will be hoat oer Westminster
But cloudy elsewhere
Till yon creepin deceptive har
Is pit back in its jar,
Ready for the next balloon
Tae laugh oot loud, and tak us aw tae toun!
23rd May
Nae Reston fir the wicked now
The train stops there, and how –
If the new timetable does allow.
PM says “nowt aff the table”
As sure as he is able
Tae procure relief,
Spake in words fae a forked tongue
Through laughin teeth.
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
A cannae mak heid nor tail
An ma weather guess is sure tae fail
Should A gan oan watching the BBC,
Ma forecast micht be aw at sea.
So it’s back tae ma Grandpa’s barometer
Which things oan the livinroom wa
The yin he won at the boolin
In nineteen fifty twa.
21st May
Museums of Scotland celebrate
Wie somethin ye love,
Or somethin ye hate
But tae find oot ye’ll hae tae wait.
PM and Sue Gray meet oan the quiet,
Wonder whit that’s aboot?
Maybe thir diet?
Wine, canapes –
Or beer perhaps?
AddNibs Weather WARNING
A high o 14Β° degrees
Will no exactly hae ye oan yer knees.
A low o 11Β°
Isnae exactly Heaven
But dinnae despair,
June is nearly thare!
20th May
If ye fancy a late nicht oot
Ye’ll no git the train, withoot a doobt
Nae worries there though,
The Charmer’s blawin her flute.π
Twa hunner signed up for gowf
Ithers think it somewhat bowf
Rather keek it fae thir howff.
Nation keeps Mary’s casket
Oer dear? Ye’ll need tae asket.
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
Ain wa fell doon
An by three the day in this fair toun
Ye better watch ye dinnae droon.
19th May
Bogie Betty dis her round
Wie slippers only an inch fae the ground,
A wary an a scary tale
Aw the wie fae Carbisdale.
Third time lucky
Micht mak the Borders plucky
An the Cooncellor prood
Tae be a Borders Cooncil dude
Effect an innings that aw will remember
Even though it will end by September.π₯
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
At last the Orb goes wa tae wa,
Na cloods, nae wind, nae rain at aw!π
Tae the beach ye’ll aw be filin
Except fir those, like moi, whae hate tae be bilin
We’ll no be smilin.π«
Have a nice day!π½
18th May
Swinger dis 36 hoors in ain go,
Fairly pittin oan a show
Whilst bairns waitin oan thir shot,
Think the hale thing toffee rot.
Borders Cooncil tae fix thir highways,
Repair the tar oan aw the byways,
“Withoot pitfalls or potholes”,
A thing cyclists cannae thole!
Bit whit aboot the Borders bairns?
Fir years they thoucht folk wirnae carin
When thir trikes cam asunder
Oan the Borders fancy hunder!
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
No a bad day the day,
Though the cloods hanae gain away
An neither his manky May.
A micht be wrang,
But dis Manky May soond like a sang?
Weel ma guitar string jist went twang!
17th May
Greedy angel taks its share,
Leavin Glenfarclas cupboard bare
PM admits surprise
That Brexit has him up tae his eyes
In Irish muck an glaur
Bet he wishes that wis oer.
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
Shrouds o clouds and gentle breeze
Will hae ye oan yer knees
Prayin fir a glimpse o sun
Slapping suncream by the ton
But dinnae hud yer breathin,
Or ye’ll just end up seethin
An still sittin freezin.
16th May
Easy gien bonus
Cause it pits the onus
Oan thir cabin crew
Whae mair an mair prefer the bru.
He’s nae fool
Keeps his cool
Haen 16 simmits
Seems he has nae limits.
AddNib’s Weather WARNING
Ne’re cast a cloot,
Or yer wellies ya big galoot,
Fir the East will keek like West
Sae dinnae gan oot in yer vest
Working far hame micht be best
Unless yer a servant civil
Whae’s use tae lots o drivvel.