To all you virtuous readers out there I wish to thank you for your patience. The Damask Weaver has gone from one forensic lab to another, been dissected, disarmed, studied and given umpteen facelifts and tucks but he is now about ready for the road.

Yes, he’s missed the Spring and Summer but Autumn was always his favourite season, particularly September when that cooling air cools our ardour and gives us time to take breath.

And as you do, watch out for the Weaver, you’ll recognise him from the cut of his cloth.

1st June

“I did break no code!

That is just a tad overload,

I merely had a swig, or two –

Whilst laughing loudly,

Mainly at YOU!”

Dinnae turn up early for yer flight,

An it micht be awright oan the night,

Or ye micht be stranded

Cause oer many folk hae landed

An no enough planes, tae be candid.

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

This is nae a bummer dude,

At last it’s summer, sae dinnae be rude

An say oor climate isnae good.

When yesterday a wore ma shorts,

Noo dinnae gie me smart retorts

But A’d made that mistake again,

Withoot a doobt,

Dinnae cast a cloot

Till May is oot.😫🥴🥶

27th May

Abba oan a virtual tour

MacGregor back wie Obi

Time for us tae relive oor past

Play fitba in the loaby.

Ross disnae half talk some dross,

“He should, he shouldnae,

He could, he couldnae,

He micht but wouldnae.

Whar A’m A,

Whae A’m A

A sheep, or maybe jist a lama?”

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

High winds an high clouds

Hae yer washin dance like shrouds

“Weel done cutty sark”

Leave it oot tae efter dark

Nae rain will fa tae spile it,

But if it does it wisnae me,

Complaints in writing please

Tae the BBC.

26th May

Indestructible money lobby

Stinks awfie like a jobby

When citizens die alone

As PM toasts his own.🥃

Plebiscite’s a distorted sight

When yer vote turns tae laughs,

An gaffs

An guffaws

That echo roond the money ha’s.

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

Dark clouds loomin oer the UK

Sae dinnae think that aw’s okay

Fir the nightmare oan civvy street

Will no gan away

Weel certainly no the day!😫

25th May

A buddy ca’d Sue

Hae been scrieven aboot a do, or two

An the day’s the day

She’ll hae her say!

Oh whit a Gray day for some,

Either yon fakes sittin oan thir bum,

Yon yins that turn liquid gold tae scum,

Or ye wie a franchise tae protect

Micht see the hale clamjamfry wrecked.

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

It will be hoat oer Westminster

But cloudy elsewhere

Till yon creepin deceptive har

Is pit back in its jar,

Ready for the next balloon

Tae laugh oot loud, and tak us aw tae toun!

23rd May

Nae Reston fir the wicked now

The train stops there, and how –

If the new timetable does allow.

PM says “nowt aff the table”

As sure as he is able

Tae procure relief,

Spake in words fae a forked tongue

Through laughin teeth.

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

A cannae mak heid nor tail

An ma weather guess is sure tae fail

Should A gan oan watching the BBC,

Ma forecast micht be aw at sea.

So it’s back tae ma Grandpa’s barometer

Which things oan the livinroom wa

The yin he won at the boolin

In nineteen fifty twa.

21st May

Museums of Scotland celebrate

Wie somethin ye love,

Or somethin ye hate

But tae find oot ye’ll hae tae wait.

PM and Sue Gray meet oan the quiet,

Wonder whit that’s aboot?

Maybe thir diet?

Wine, canapes –

Or beer perhaps?

AddNibs Weather WARNING

A high o 14° degrees

Will no exactly hae ye oan yer knees.

A low o 11°

Isnae exactly Heaven

But dinnae despair,

June is nearly thare!

20th May

If ye fancy a late nicht oot

Ye’ll no git the train, withoot a doobt

Nae worries there though,

The Charmer’s blawin her flute.🐍

Twa hunner signed up for gowf

Ithers think it somewhat bowf

Rather keek it fae thir howff.

Nation keeps Mary’s casket

Oer dear? Ye’ll need tae asket.

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

Ain wa fell doon

An by three the day in this fair toun

Ye better watch ye dinnae droon.

19th May

Bogie Betty dis her round

Wie slippers only an inch fae the ground,

A wary an a scary tale

Aw the wie fae Carbisdale.

Third time lucky

Micht mak the Borders plucky

An the Cooncellor prood

Tae be a Borders Cooncil dude

Effect an innings that aw will remember

Even though it will end by September.😥

AddNib’s Weather WARNING

At last the Orb goes wa tae wa,

Na cloods, nae wind, nae rain at aw!😊

Tae the beach ye’ll aw be filin

Except fir those, like moi, whae hate tae be bilin

We’ll no be smilin.😫

Have a nice day!🗽